Camper, Actually
Uncommunicative camper guy eventually came through! A friend of the original friend (friend-2-removed) found a friend (3-removed) who had a camper and wanted to sell it. So after a few shady handshakes and payoffs and other transactions I'd rather not get into, I have a camper.
I've named her Babe and parked her in a partially-cleared trail at the back of the property. Her former family took great care of her, so though she's a turn-of-the-century model, there's very little wrong with her and lots of thoughtful little touches (command hooks, pots'n'pans, spare parts of various sorts).
And so just in time for Independence Day, Babe is in the woods and has a fridge fulla beer. Bring on the fireworks and let's dig a foundation!
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